you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize