that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
