Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
