she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
