woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
