every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
