the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
