it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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