found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Farmville is her only friend.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
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