He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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