aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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