Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize