i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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