Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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