guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
