do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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