I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize