you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
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