Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
