Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
