butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
love makes seman taste better
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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