i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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