"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
