check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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