I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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