After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
