In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize