I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
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