I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
