Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
this will be a night to untag.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
My vagina is officially offended.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
