You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
