I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
