he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
