East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
