what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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