So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize