Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
