what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
