So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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