I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize