well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
