My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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