i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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