you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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