I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
