If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
