Christians are straight up FREAKS
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
you had me at cake vodka
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
The adults are the big ones right?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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