Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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