HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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