if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
