Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
