What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
